Showing Tag: "relationships" (Show all posts)

Being Vulnerable in Relationships

Posted by Nathan Oliver on Thursday, June 6, 2013, In : Relationships 

One of the biggest issues we have in relationships is being able to fully be ourselves in the presence of another person.  If we are truly vulnerable with someone we take the risk of being hurt, rejected, judged, or shamed.  So instead we only allow others a glimpse of ourselves.  The closer you are to someone and the more your trust someone, the more likely you are do be vulnerable with them. 

People are often able to be more vulnerable in counseling than any other place because they know tha...

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Guard Your Heart

Posted by Nathan Oliver on Wednesday, October 19, 2011, In : Valuing Self 


We often hear in life that we need to guard our hearts from the hurts and wounds of others.  The challenge is finding the balance between guarding your heart and putting your heart out there in relationships with those you trust to build connection and intimacy.  Rather than guarding your heart, we prefer to call this balance of protection and vulnerability “valuing your heart”. 

Many of us have been deeply wounded in relationships.  The wounds may be abuse in the past or present, a p...


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Forgiveness

Posted by Nathan Oliver on Tuesday, July 26, 2011, In : Grief 

Many people struggle with the idea of forgiveness for many reasons.  The biggest reason often is because the hurt and pain that someone else has inflicted on them is so great, so deep, that the idea of forgiveness seems impossible.  Indeed, there are many wounds in life that are very hard to forgive.  Abuse, betrayal, lies, cheating, and many others create great pain and tension in our lives.  The problem with not being able to eventually forgive, is that we continue to carry these wounds w...


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Manage Your Emotions

Posted by Nathan Oliver on Monday, June 13, 2011, In : Relationships 



Here we want to discuss some very practical tips on how to manage your emotions as adapted from materials by Gary J. Oliver on Emotional Relational Intelligence (ERQ).  The first step is to take a time out. Don’t let emotions escalate to the point that people are no longer talking, screaming or ignoring each other. Step back and create space either PHYSICALLY or INTERNALLY .  Set a reasonable time limit (20 minutes) when both parties agree to reconvene. 

 

The next step may seem obvi...


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Emotional Intelligence Presentation Jan. 29 West Palm Beach

Posted by Nathan Oliver on Tuesday, January 25, 2011, In : Valuing Self 


What is Emotional Intelligence?

Gary Oliver defines emotional intelligence (EQ) as:

“The ability to be aware of, recognize and understand our own feelings and those of others and to constructively manage those emotions in ourselves and in our relationships.”  Emotional intelligence has been shown to be a greater predictor of success in life, jobs, marriage, parenting and relationships than IQ.  EQ begins with having an accurate self-assessment and awareness which means knowing what ou...


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how to improve marriage- palm beach county

Posted by Nathan Oliver on Friday, December 10, 2010, In : Marriage 



Marriage can provide the greatest opportunities for connection, love and intimacy.  Because we open our hearts so vulnerably to our spouses, we can also experience great pain and struggle in our marriages.  That is why it is essential to consistently be seeking to improve your marriage and connection with your spouse.

Throughout our years in counseling, there has been no greater joy than to see a couple move from a place of hopelessness in their marriage to a place of health and growth.  The...


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Oliver Counseling


Nathan and Amy Oliver Welcome to the Oliver Counseling blog. This blog is dedicated to providing you with weekly insights into mental, emotional and relational health. It is also a place that you can bring your questions about mental health, relationships or counseling in general. We can take your questions through email and provide answers to them in the form of future blog entries.

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